Deadspin Down All Night: The System is Down

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Thanks for your continued support of HFTE. Nobody is coming up tonight, but we’ve got Sgt. Hammerclaw and DJ Jazzy Jeff Weaver coming up tomorrow. Stay safe, gentlemen.

About BronzeHammer

BronzeHammer is a warbling boner. Contact him with questions, concerns and complicated moneymaking schemes by throwing open the nearest window and hollering.
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31 Responses to Deadspin Down All Night: The System is Down

  1. Walk Off HBP says:

    Hi, guys!

    Big fan. I’m glad this is getting some traction. All of you that are writing here, you guys are good. Hope you keep this up.

    Also, Makers on the rocks.

    Also, listening to old school Red Hot Chili Peppers.

    Also, having pork chops for dinner tomorrow, recipes?

    ROCK!

  2. Dead Punk Rock Motivational Speaker says:

    Deadspin! You’re in a rut! You’ve got to get out of it!

  3. Rec Specs says:

    Hey guys! Has anyone seen the picture of Bin Laden washing up at Ground Zero? It’s TOTES REAL!!!!!1!!

    • cobra, brah! says:

      It’s funny you should say that, because Totes is one of North America’s foremost umbrella producers, and, in the event you haven’t noticed, it’s raining outside. #topical #GoldBond #fartz

  4. Mantis Toboggan, MD says:

    Horse Spunk DDAN!

    What’s Pokey so enthusiastic about anyway?

  5. cobra, brah! says:

    WHO DO I HAVE TO BLOW AROUND HERE FOR A YAKSPIN FEATURE EMPHASIZING FICTIONAL ACCOUNTS BY BURNERS DETAILING ACTUAL PEOPLE POOING THEIR PANTS IN PRESS BOXES???????????

  6. BronzeHammer says:

    Hey guys, bit of an update: I’ve lost 8 or 9 pounds since I originally typed that fatty post up.

    That’s, like, a cat. That’s pretty good. I think I’m ready to drink sugar again.

    • DJ Jazzy Jeff Weaver says:

      Congratulations! For a great lo-cal thirst quencher, surf on down to the bottom of the page and check out what Hammerclaw’s drinking. Good stuff!

      • BronzeHammer says:

        Water? In this economy?

      • DJ Jazzy Jeff Weaver says:

        Sorry, wrong page. There was another page where Hammerclaw said he was drinking a gallon of horse semen. That’s what I was thinking about. The other page. With the horse semen.

      • Sgt. Hammerclaw says:

        What I talk about in the privacy of my own pages is my own business, DJJJW!

  7. DubaiAtNight says:

    I just rode in here on Sarah Jessica Parker and boy are my arms tired!

    • DJ Jazzy Jeff Weaver says:

      Love it.

      Not gonna lie though, I had written a 10,000 word post for tomorrow with that joke as my punchline, so it’s kinda back to the drawing board now.

      • DubaiAtNight says:

        Sorry about that. Guess you’ll just have to find some other glue to hold your post together. Might I suggest ….

      • DubaiAtNight says:

        Elmer’s? It’s almost a cliché at this point, but it really works well and it does dry clear.

  8. Universal Enveloping Algebra says:

    Yeah, question here. What’s with the emphasis on joke-y comments? I don’t get it. Please explain.

  9. DJ Jazzy Jeff Weaver says:

    Hey, what’s everyone drinking tonight? Tall glass of warm milk up in hurr.

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