EXCLUSIVE: Sources close to the heart of the Notre Dame scandal have provided to Heading for the Exits an explosive transcript from a chat between Manti Te’o and his fictional girlfriend, Lennay Kekua. It is printed in its entirety below.
User Manti has entered the customer service chat line
Lenny: Good afternoon! How may I help you today, sir?
Lenny: I’m not sure I understand. Could you provide some more details?
Manti: i want a pizza
Lenny: Sir, I’m afraid you are in the wrong place.
Manti: pizza with peperonii and cheese meat to south bend
Lenny: Sir, you cannot order a pizza online here.
Manti: piza pepperonni south bend please
Lenny: Sir, this is the HP online customer support chat line.
Manti: pizzahut HP
Lenny: Hewlett Packard. This is the Hewlett Packard helpdesk.
Manti: r u prettay lennay
Lenny: My name is Lenny. I am male.
Manti: what u wear lennay
Lenny: A polo shirt.
Manti: i lov u lennay
Lenny: Sir, can I ask you to please disconnect from this chat room. I cannot move on to help the next customer until you disconnect.
Manti: lennay u r prettay i lluv u
Lenny: I love you too. But I have cancer.
Manti: o no
Lenny: Oh God! A car is coming right at me! Slow down!!
Manti: stop car
Lenny: The car hit me and I died of cancer.
Lenny: I’m dead now. I have died.
Manti: no lennay
Lenny: I am dead. Goodbye forever.
Manti: pizza with cheese meat peperronii to south bend